pretty young thing

my dad emailed this to me. found it hilarious so i thought i'd share it.

Title: Young and pretty lady wishes to marry a rich guy. Fantastic reply
from a financial person

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:
Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year.
I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with
$500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual
salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York . My
requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income
of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should
I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've dated, the richest
is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If
someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of
New York City Garden ( ? ) , $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please
list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches is only
average-looking? I've met a few girls who doesn't have
looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry
rich guys
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who
can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get
married)

Ms. Pretty


Here's a reply from a Wall Street Financial guy:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots
of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please
allow me to analyze your situation as a professional investor.
My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your
requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting
time here.

From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision
to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put
the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of
"beauty" and "money": Person A provides beauty, and Person B
pays for it, fair and square. However, there's a deadly problem
here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone
without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase
from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.
Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation
asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal
depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only
asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a
position, dating with you is also a "trading position". If the
trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to
keep it for long term â€" same goes with the marriage that you
wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a
wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be
sold or "leased". Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a
fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would
advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich
guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich
person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than
finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing"
services, do contact me
signed, J.P. Morgan

hehe. so all those girls out there who are hoping to find a rich guy to settle down with, better hope he hasn't read this before. haha


and in response to saggy,
no, u're not the only one. people in general are STUPID with UNSATIABLE DESIRES. and in the pursuit of those desires, they lose what they hold dear to them. hehe.

best thing to do? just take whatever losses in your stride. dont regret. because at one point in time, that was what you wanted. hehe. not sure who or where i got that from. but it sounded right in this context. haha

final thoughts: on a whole different note, i think friendship is overrated.