1. Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed?
2. If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth?
3. Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
4. Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?
5. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, ‘My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic’?
6. If you mated a bulldog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit?
7. Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?
8. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
9. Why does mineral water that ‘has trickled through mountains for centuries’ have a ‘use by’ date?
10. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?
11. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
12. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, ‘I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out’?
13. What do people in China call their good plates?
14. If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat?
15. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
16. Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs!
17. What do you call male ballerinas?
18. Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
19. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn’t he just buy dinner?
20. Why is a person that handles your money called a ‘Broker’?
21. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
22. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,then what is baby oil made from?
23. If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him,is he still wrong?
24. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
25. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
26. Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it’s in your ass?
27. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
p/s: i did not write this. i just found it somewhere and thought it was funny. hehe
enjoy
cheers
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
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